Okay, this recipe goes against everything I stand for. I’m a staunch supporter of homemade pie crusts and am not a huge fan of refrigerated crescent rolls. Cooking with soda is one of those Southern traditions like eating squirrel and pickling okra that I just have a hard time getting behind. And yet…this is easily in my top 3 dessert recipes. Ever. It is up there with pizzookies and that is saying a lot. Maybe it’s the radioactive nature of Mountain Dew or the sheer amount of butter involved, but these are A. MAZ. ING. Food-gasmic. Dumplightful, as my husband once called them. Okay, we might be heading in the wrong direction here…

I first found this recipe on The Pioneer Woman’s cooking blog. From many vehement comments over there, I discovered that this recipe has dark and mysterious origins–some people claim it comes from Allrecipes, others say that it’s from an old Pillsbury cookbook, their grandma, or Recipezaar. I don’t know what the truth is, but I do know that the world is a happier place with magical Mountain Dew-spiked slices of apple wrapped in cheap, canned pastry. So no knocking these until you’ve tried them. Seriously.

Apple Dumplings

2 medium Granny Smith apples
2 cans crescent rolls
2 sticks butter
1 1/2 c. sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
cinnamon (for sprinkling)
12 oz. (1 can) Mountain Dew or Sprite. This bottle is WAY too much Mountain Dew, but apparently it is no longer possible to buy a single can of soda without making a deal with the Devil himself.

Preheat oven to 350. Spray a 9×13 pan with non-stick cooking spray. Peel apples and cut into 8ths. This is where I started breaking rules because I’m a lazy kind of girl and if I had to hand-peel and core apples, they would never get peeled or cored. So I used my apple corer peeler (which slices the apples for me),

cut the cored, peeled, sliced apple in half, and then divided each apple into 8ths.

Open a can of crescent roll dough and carefully separate the dough along the perforations. Place 1/8 of an apple on one segment of dough

and then roll/wrap the apple in the dough. Place in the prepared pan and repeat with remaining apples and dough. Set aside.

In a medium saucepan, melt butter and add sugar and vanilla. Stir to combine. Pour butter/sugar mixture over the apples, then pour the can of Mountain Dew (or Sprite, although I’ve never actually tried it), on top of everything. Sprinkle the pan with cinnamon and bake for 40 minutes.

When the dumplings are done, remove from oven and serve with a ladle-ful of sauce. I usually plan on two dumplings per person, before they go back for seconds. And then breakfast. Then second breakfast. Then a little snack. For true transcendent awesomeness, serve with a scoop of vanilla ice cream.

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